One of the first pharmacists I trained with often used to quietly mutter things I couldn’t understand. I would ask “Excuse me… what did you say?” thinking he was talking to me. But he was just talking to himself. “All pharmacists do… it keeps us sane!” he joked!
And before long, I noticed I was doing it too. I found it helped me to organize and focus on what I was doing. Pharmacies are busy places with many distractions and stresses. I think most of us talk to ourselves at times but perhaps not always out loud so others can hear. This “self-talk” can be useful, or it can be detrimental. It all depends on what we say to ourselves…
There are 3 basic types of self-talk:
- Positive self-talk – words or thoughts that help motivate us, help us to focus on the task at hand, or reinforce positive thoughts and emotions. “Good job, Jeannie… keep it up!”
- Negative self-talk – criticizing or doubting ourselves, dwelling on negative emotions or events. “Why work so hard on that blog… you don’t know whether anyone actually reads it!”
- Neutral self-talk – neither positive or negative, usually giving oneself instructions. “OK that's done… what’s next?”
Self-talk can also be referred to as either “overt talk” (when you say these thoughts to yourself out loud so others can overhear) or “covert talk” (when you say the words silently inside your head or by just mouthing the words with no sound). Either way, the benefits or self-harm are in the thoughts you are telling yourself and the resulting emotions you generate.
Benefits of talking to yourself
Self-talk can be a way of processing and controlling emotions, for example anger or anxiety. Of course, depending on what you tell yourself, self-talk can increase these emotions too. The key is to be aware of what you’re saying to yourself and use it to reach the result you want.
Self-talk is also useful for weighing the pros and cons of a decision when you don’t have someone to discuss it with. I often do this out loud, presumably speaking to my husband (who has learned to mostly ignore these “conversations”). By the time I’ve explained the details of my options ( often concerned with writing or publishing that he's generally not involved in), I usually have reached a decision anyway.
Just saying the pros and cons out loud helps me weigh it all out. Interesting, isn’t it? I suppose I could write it all down and get the same result, but my one-sided conversation seems easier and works just as well. Fortunately I have a patient hubby!
Researchers have also discovered that referring to yourself in the third person can help even better when it comes to calming anxiety. They believe it may be because it tends to distance you from the emotion rather than being consumed by it, allowing you to analyze, process and regulate an emotion that can be harmful. Using 3rd person self-talk to control other emotions like anger or prolonged grief could be expected to work in a similar way.
Alternatives to self-talk
If talking to yourself is something you’d rather avoid (for fear of sounding silly!) there are alternatives. Writing these thoughts in a journal or a phone journaling app can work similarly for some people. Just getting the thoughts down on paper or a screen can help to clear your mind, organize thoughts or manage emotions.
Or you could train yourself to say the words internally rather than out loud. I think we all have a certain level of filter that stops us from saying things that we know would be inappropriate in a particular setting or in the presence of certain people.
And it may be helpful to actually talk to someone you trust who is a good listener. For some, verbalizing thoughts is more linear while internal thoughts can easily run in repetitive circles in your mind.
Of course, speaking with a mental health professional would be advised if negative self-talk is affecting a person's quality of life. They would have additional suggestions and advice to help adjust self-talk to a more positive and encouraging focus as well as other useful strategies and treatments.
However, if talking to yourself is accompanied by hallucinations, this could be a sign of a serious condition such as schizophrenia. Hallucinations are when a person senses things that are not really there through their vision, hearing, smell, taste or touch. Hearing voices and answering them, for example, is a common hallucination in schizophrenia.
Bottom line?
Talking to yourself is a normal behaviour and is usually not part of a mental health condition. It can be a useful tool to help organize your thoughts, boost your mood or get yourself motivated… whether you say the words out loud, in your mind or write them down.
Lastly, just a comment about my example of negative self-talk above – we writers do sometimes wonder whether anyone actually reads our work! The only way we really know we’re doing something useful is when you comment or “like” an article. Fortunately, I do get comments and questions fairly often and sometimes they turn into a conversation.
Feedback keeps us going! So, let me know what you’re thinking after you read my blog… I’d love to hear from you! And please share and/or like any articles that you find interesting or helpful so others can find them more easily too.
Reference:
Is it normal to talk to yourself? – Medical News Today
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